Thoughts Need to be Expressed

No need to comment. Just something I need to release before I sleep.

There's this wall between us that I'm trying my hardest to tear down. My hands get cold as my heart feels heavy. I feel things are slowly fading like the things we used to do. Not long ago, you comforted me when my own mother put me down for a certain incident. I enjoy our all night talks and the ongoing insults I would give you in exchange for compliments. I love how you easily make me smile for the littlest things you say or do. Makes me feel that I can confide to you for anything at anytime.

Nowadays, after how things are with my life, I'm slowly fading away. Even if I still talk to you, I know it's not as enough as it was. Maybe I'm a bit over ahead, but I miss your ongoing presence. I've always enjoyed your company since the first time I discovered you. Everything about you somehow made me drawn to you in terms of our conversations. I wish we had those kind of talks that are longer than how it is. You say I can always go to you anytime, but for some reason I'm staying back. I'm probably afraid to open myself a bit to you knowing that I haven't expressed any emotions thus far but here.

I feel a bit bummed as I'm writing this, but I guess it's me who's feeling this way. I don't want to be in the way or anything. I'm sorry I haven't been carrying our daily conversations and I'm hoping we can get all the time we've wasted back. Things just keep appearing that keep me away. If anything, I'd like to make all of it up to you. It seems as though I've known you longer than I thought. I don't care if it's been a short while, but every moment whether if it's not in person means something more to me. I don't know if you see it that way as I do but that's how it's been. I do consider you important and always will be.

But for now, I'm going to let this pass and hoping for a better day. I just can't go on like this right now. Goodnight...