So I somehow have the urge to make a blog at nearly 2 a.m. on a Saturday morning. I know, it's pretty late. I've been up way past 2 anyway. I don't know where to start, but I'll give it a try [damn writer's block].
I'm going to let some things out in random order. So forgive me if I'm going off topic.
I was looking over my baby photos and each page had different memories. All of them gave me a warm feeling in my heart. Just looking at them brings me happiness and it tears me up. Although I hold it in, I know deep down I'm partially upset because I miss them. These memories are what brings me strength and a sense of hope. I don't dwell into these memories as I used to, but encountering them every now and then is okay. Just a reminder that these memories made me who I am today. And I'm glad I got to share those memories with my family and my deceased loved ones.
Looking back into my mistakes, I know how much I've hurt others and neglected them when I shouldn't have. I was naive and ignorant, but as I've told myself before, no one is perfect. We're meant to make mistakes anyway and it's natural. We've exchanged words that we didn't mean or hold grudges that was too ridiculous. I used to be one of those people who would hold a long time grudge, maybe up to a year or two. Then I realized, is it really that worth it? This is some childish game that should have ended way long before. At this point, I don't have any animosity towards anyone, and never will. I really don't care if anyone has something against me. It's not like I need them to be in my life. I've gotten out of the drama zone because all I can think of is the amount of hatred people have over something small or something that isn't even worth fighting about. It's not a place to put yourself into.
I've learned to let go of the past and focus on what's ahead. I've learned things the harder way and I'm still learning more of what life is offering. I can't say I have the full knowledge to everything because I still have a long way to go. Even if I seem to not care what my surroundings are or what I must do to get to where I am, I still care. This is MY life and it's my most important one yet. I feel like each day is a new life lesson and something to think about. Because of the advice I've been given from others from the past, it has helped me open my eyes a bit more to the beautiful side of life. I should be appreciative of what I have than to worry of what I wish I could have. I don't mind because I can't have everything I desired for. I know I've taken things for granted and I regret, but hey...it's a common mistake. I'm near at the point where I get to decide what is it in life that I want to be and how to get there. It's a scary feeling to know that I'll be on my own, even if I'll be going through independence and freedom. But it's not going to be an easy path. Thinking about what's ahead may be too early, but it's a great start to get things done so it would be a little easier on my end. What college I want to attend and where are the only things that have crossed my mind. I know later on I'll eventually find out, but it'll take me some deep thinking to know what my answer is.
I just hope it works well...
I'm going to let some things out in random order. So forgive me if I'm going off topic.
I was looking over my baby photos and each page had different memories. All of them gave me a warm feeling in my heart. Just looking at them brings me happiness and it tears me up. Although I hold it in, I know deep down I'm partially upset because I miss them. These memories are what brings me strength and a sense of hope. I don't dwell into these memories as I used to, but encountering them every now and then is okay. Just a reminder that these memories made me who I am today. And I'm glad I got to share those memories with my family and my deceased loved ones.
Looking back into my mistakes, I know how much I've hurt others and neglected them when I shouldn't have. I was naive and ignorant, but as I've told myself before, no one is perfect. We're meant to make mistakes anyway and it's natural. We've exchanged words that we didn't mean or hold grudges that was too ridiculous. I used to be one of those people who would hold a long time grudge, maybe up to a year or two. Then I realized, is it really that worth it? This is some childish game that should have ended way long before. At this point, I don't have any animosity towards anyone, and never will. I really don't care if anyone has something against me. It's not like I need them to be in my life. I've gotten out of the drama zone because all I can think of is the amount of hatred people have over something small or something that isn't even worth fighting about. It's not a place to put yourself into.
I've learned to let go of the past and focus on what's ahead. I've learned things the harder way and I'm still learning more of what life is offering. I can't say I have the full knowledge to everything because I still have a long way to go. Even if I seem to not care what my surroundings are or what I must do to get to where I am, I still care. This is MY life and it's my most important one yet. I feel like each day is a new life lesson and something to think about. Because of the advice I've been given from others from the past, it has helped me open my eyes a bit more to the beautiful side of life. I should be appreciative of what I have than to worry of what I wish I could have. I don't mind because I can't have everything I desired for. I know I've taken things for granted and I regret, but hey...it's a common mistake. I'm near at the point where I get to decide what is it in life that I want to be and how to get there. It's a scary feeling to know that I'll be on my own, even if I'll be going through independence and freedom. But it's not going to be an easy path. Thinking about what's ahead may be too early, but it's a great start to get things done so it would be a little easier on my end. What college I want to attend and where are the only things that have crossed my mind. I know later on I'll eventually find out, but it'll take me some deep thinking to know what my answer is.
I just hope it works well...
aww abby such a lovely baby. <3
ReplyDeleteWell for me its like once a week theres a life lesson, the rest of the time is just being lazy and a slob.