I don't get it

What I hate right now is the fact that people you thought they care for you would suddenly push you away right out of the blue. The feeling of frustration and partial sadness is what I'm having right now. Mostly it's all frustration at this point. Now I know that I've lost friendships over the past few years and I know that in some, it was my fault. I do tend to push others away without realizing it. I do all these mistakes simply because I'm human . We're all meant to make mistakes in life. I don't know what I did to this certain person, but I'm no longer going to have it.

I'm tired of caring too much and try to fix things. For this one, I won't even attempt to resolve anything. I can't seem to comprehend this person's way of behavior towards others. I knew that last month, I had to break away from the remarks. I was not going to deal with his bullshit. For once, I felt the kindness from this person towards me instantly shifted. I just missed how he and I would communicate over anything, no matter how short or long the conversation was. I have no idea who he is anymore.

I won't give any thought on what I should do. I already decided to move on with it and not make things worse. My mind has set up on its own. Sometimes, when people seem to break away from me, I feel like a horrible person even if I did not do anything to offend them. That sort of guilt stays within me for a while. There are times where that guilt still lingers. I can't undo what happened nor have a say to it. It comes to show that I shouldn't care for those who don't need me in general.

If I could, I would apologize for whatever it is I did to anyone. It may be too late to say sorry because it may not cut it. That's all I can say, just sorry. There's not much to include for that. I want to finally live in peace. I don't need any dead weight to pull me back, which concludes that I don't need that person.

I'll be editing about my day later tonight. I had to get this out of the way.